Trusting our own inner voice.
There have been so many times in my life, where I didn’t say something or ask a question because I was scared of being judged or being perceived as “wrong.”
We live in a society where we are taught to be GOOD PEOPLE. We think that by being good, we will be liked and accepted, as if being disliked is a BAD thing.
There is a part of me who desperately wants to be liked by others and perceived as a good person, and sometimes, that prevents me from speaking out and voicing my truth.
Lately, I have been inspired by others who are using their voice to speak what is true for them, regardless if it resonates with every single person or not. It has helped me stand in my own truth, even if what I am sharing is not the “popular” opinion.
Before I share what’s on my heart, let’s remember to be kind as we share our truth with others. This doesn’t mean that we won’t disagree from time to time, it just means what we will be decent human beings and treat one another with love and care, amid our disagreements.
In short: be kind.
Let’s get into the nuts and bolts of this blog post:
I took a three-week break from social media a few weeks ago, during the time George Floyd was killed by the white police officer, Derek Chauvin.
As I re-entered, I felt a little overwhelmed by everything that was being shared and I felt unsure about what to share or if I would share anything at all.
Prior to getting back on Social, I decided to educate myself on white supremacy and systemic racism, through podcasts and having tough conversations with the people I love, live, and work with. That was a hard week, but it was crucial, and it enabled me to see life through a clearer lens.
Prior to educating myself on this topic, I was scared to say the wrong thing(s) or be perceived as a bad person, because I had different beliefs than some of the people I love, live, and work with, BUT, after digging deep, having tough conversations, getting it wrong, saying the ‘wrong’ thing(s), looking through multiple lens’s, and feeling triggered, I landed somewhere new.
(I am not claiming to be right, further, my beliefs could change tomorrow, but right now, this is what feels true for me.)
We are all human beings who crave to be loved and cared for. We want to feel like we matter and that we BELONG.
If we can go into conversations with this in mind, whether we are talking to someone who is white, black, brown, etc., we know that on the deepest level, we all want the same thing: to feel loved and to belong.
We all share that in common, PLUS, please let us remember that we all come from the same place.
Let that sink in. We all come from the same place.
We are also are not always going to agree with everyone. In fact, we will probably trigger and get triggered by our friends and loved ones, but that's okay.
We can't let that stop us from having tough and uncomfortable conversations, regardless of the topic, because that’s how we will change and evolve into the people we were put on earth to be.
In fact, just last week, as I was listening to an episode of Brene Brown's podcast, I got triggered. I texted a friend to tell her and asked her what her thoughts were.
She responded, “I think if anyone tells you that talking about white supremacy and systemic racism is not triggering- in some way, they are lying!”
So how do we navigate our way through being triggered and having tough and uncomfortable conversations, regardless of the topic? There is a lot of controversial shit happening right now, and we will not all agree.
So how do we navigate it for ourselves?
I made list of things I have done and the realizations I have learned along the way. I hope this helps!
#1: Be willing to get triggered.
We gotta be willing to have tough conversations and potentially disagree on some topics. It ain't easy and it won't feel good all of the time, but who said it had to be?
We can be kind and also disagree with one another.
#2: Question Everything.
Question things you don’t understand. Keep seeking the truth and keep asking questions. If something doesn't feel right, it's probably because it's not.
#3: Trust your own inner knowing.
This is huge.
A lot of us follow the popular opinion on certain topics, without ever consulting with ourselves. We look to the authority figures or systems to give us clarity about what to believe and what not to believe. I believe this is one of our BIGGEST problems. If something doesn’t sit right or feels off, question it. It is time we start trusting our own inner knowing, over anything else.
Unplug. Retreat. Take a break.
When I took that three-week break from social media, I felt SO FREE and remembered what life was like WITHOUT social media.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, confused, anxious, sad, depressed, etc., think about taking a break from social media.
Here are a few other things you can do with your time:
Listen to podcasts
Take a hike or walk in nature
Call an old friend you haven’t spoken to in a while.
Learn to meditate
Play with animals
Read a new book
Take time to BE.
Lastly, it is so important to tend to ourselves right now.
We are all waking up to the corruption and the systems that are no longer working in the world.
Take time to be and meditate.
Sit with yourself.
Be with yourself.
Care for yourself.
And let us all be KIND, both to ourselves and others.
As MLK said, hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.